Signs that you’re a people pleaser

Do you relate to any of these?
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In a Nutshell
For most of my life, I was a people pleaser. As time went on, I realized just how detrimental this tendency was to my well-being and how frequently I dismissed my own needs for the sake of meeting someone else's. Not anymore! Speaking up, saying no, etc., can be challenging. It will likely be a long-term practice. But I believe the pros of putting myself first (while still being kind to others) far outweigh the cons.
Today, let's discuss how to tell if you're a people pleaser, how this tendency may negatively affect you, and tips to break the habit.
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Take care of yourself,
Morgan Mandriota
Newsletter Editor, Healthline
 
 
  Written by Morgan Mandriota
December 18, 2024 • 3 min read
 
 
 
 
 
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How to stop people pleasing — and why you may want to
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How to stop people pleasing — and why you may want to
Kicking people-pleasing tendencies starts with understanding what they are. Here are some telltale signs:
  • It's hard for you to say "no."
  • You need others to like you.
  • You apologize or accept fault when you aren't to blame.
  • You express agreement, even when you disagree.
  • You're afraid of rejection.
It's important to note that acting selflessly — being a giver, helping others, and going out of your way to be kind — is not the same as people-pleasing. People pleasing is when you neglect your own needs, feelings, and health in order to get someone to like or approve of you. After a while, you might find that these habits lead to stress, burnout, resentment toward friends and family, and being taken advantage of.
Take it from me, it's possible to break the people-pleasing habit — and still be kind, generous, and supportive! These tips can help you get started:
  • Learn to set boundaries.
  • Practice getting comfortable with being disliked.
  • Wait until you're asked to offer help.
  • Speak up when something is bothering you.
  • Talk with a therapist.
People pleasing may be especially relevant during the holiday season. You might feel obligated to say "yes" to everyone and everything at the cost of your well-being. To protect your peace, you might consider saying "no" to events to give yourself the chance to rest or not being afraid to ask for help if you're hosting a party.
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Thanks for reading! Have you overcome any people-pleasing tendencies? If so, how did the change make you feel? Share your experience with us at wellnesswire@healthline.com. (Your name and response may be featured in an upcoming newsletter.)
 
 
 
 
 
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